It became apparent to me that every time I was comforting a woman after a close friend died, whether it was his mum, my aunt or someone else I barely knew, that I had a tendency to rub them in a way that is only appropriate if they’re your partner. It’s something I really need to address. I shouldn’t really be feeling bra straps – that has no place in the grieving process – or pinching hips, when I’m comforting someone. That’s not comforting. It troubles me. My comforting style’s not good. Definitely got to work on my comforting.